Spending money

29 August 1993

....

Listening to more people with serious health and financial problems, I realize again how lucky I've been, except that I don't believe in luck, per se. It's more a combination of temperament (cautious, conservative, non-violent, staid, ...) and chance (genetics, upbringing, time, place, ...), mostly chance.

In related reflections this week: I've changed my spending habits some lately. After being frugal to the point of miserliness all my life, I've recently begun to splurge in small ways, and to generally worry less about what I spend. I have decided that I am (I hope) financially secure and putting enough aside for the future, and can afford it.

All my adult life, I've watched everyone around me happily indulge in America's consumer culture while I've held back. I've never really been that tempted; there's still little of it that attracts me, but I've slowly begun to join in, in the most crucial way -- I don't immediately dismiss every whimsical thought of spending on something. Maybe it's a mild mid-life crisis. I think it's OK.